The Lies We Believe

I remember one particular afternoon when my family went out to watch a movie and have dinner. With everyone away it was an opportunity for me to have some quiet time and get a lot of ‘studying’ done for the exam the next day.

Much to my surprise, however, I felt tremendous loneliness and sadness after they left. I thought about everything was wrong with my life as a medical student, it made me hopelessly depressed. It was so bad I couldn’t think about anything else. These thoughts paralyzed me to such a degree that I didn’t open up to my accountability friends and ask for an advice. I didn’t get any studying done. I just sat in my table with an open Bible in front of me, I kept scanning and reading encouraging verses, reciting God’s promises over and over to comfort me but the tears just kept on streaming down my cheeks.

“Lord, what’s the matter with me and what I should do about it,” I prayed.

For the next 5 minutes, I listened to Christians praise and worship songs. I prayed. A short while, I sensed the heavy blanket of spiritual oppression lift. It lifted so suddenly and completely that I realized I had been dealing with a direct attack from the enemy. It wanted me to feel alone, invisible and not cared for. It wanted me to feel sad about my calling of becoming a doctor because it can be really stressful and lonely most of the time. Trust me, if you’re a melancholic person, the exaggeration of thoughts will drown you.

TAKE CONTROL

2642The other day, I was having a deep conversation with my best friends. I told them about how I struggle with overthinking and being so hard on myself. I realized that I didn’t have to entertain every thought that came into my head. I had a choice about whether to listen to them or not; That worrying changes nothing. NOT. A. SINGLE. THING. And the truth with worrying is, 90% of the time, the scenario you play in your head is much worse than reality. That moment on, I decided to have a new vision for my life and my future, and a renewed commitment to identify and resist the enemy’s lies. I realized I should have caught his lies the minute they entered my mind instead of entertaining them as truth.

A big part of standing against the enemy is taking control over our minds. Therefore, we must learn to bring every thought into captivity because when we are not raised to discern the voices in our head, we won’t recognize the voice of the devil. He is really a clever deceiver who will come to each one of us and try to speak lies into our minds. So, be ready. Get ready with bible verses as your weapon.

THE LIES WE BELIEVE

raw

Do you every have certain thoughts that play over and over in your mind like an old broken record? Have you ever had a thought come to your mind that produces feeling in your body, such as a pain in your heart, a queasy sensation in the pit of your stomach, tightness in your throat, weakness in your arms and legs, tears in your eyes? Do “what if” thoughts ever plague your mind, such as “What if I jumped off the balcony?” or “What if I get lost in the woods?”. The harsh reality is, suicidal thoughts are overlooked by many. Have you also had “If only” thoughts? Such as, “If only I hadn’t done that.” In my case, “If I only knew that medical school would be this hard.” “If only I had been there.” “If only my husband looks like him.” Do you ever have self punishing thoughts? “No one loves me.” “I’m such a failure. “I’m no good.” “Nothing I do turns right.”

If you’ve had thoughts like these, please know that this is not God giving you revelation for your life. It is the enemy trying to gain control of your mind.

People has much suffering because of lies we believe about ourselves and circumstances. In fact, we accept the words that are spoken to our souls by an enemy who wants nothing but destroy us. That’s why if we aren’t aware of the enemy’s deceit, it can make us fearful, depressed, lonely, angry, doubtful, confused, insecure, hopeless, and full of self-pity. But again, we are to choose if we would believe such thing. So the antidote to this is overcome each one of these lies with prayer, faith, and the truth of God’s Word. It’s always truth over feelings.

CHOOSE YOUR THOUGHTS CAREFULLY

giphy (2)

You have a choice about what you will accept into your mind and what you won’t. You can choose to take every thought captive and “let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 2:5), or you can allow the devil to feed you lies and manipulate your life. If you don’t take control of your mind, the devil will.

That’s why we must be diligent to monitor what we allow into our minds. What TV shows, magazines, and books do we look at? What music do we listen to? Do they fill our minds with godly thoughts and feed our spirit so we feel enriched, peaceful, and blessed, or do they deplete us and leave us feeling empty, confused, anxious, and fearful? God is not the author of confusion but of peace. When we fill our minds with God’s Word and godly books and magazines written by people in whom God’s Spirit resides, and listen to music that praises and glorifies Him, we leave no room for the enemy’s propaganda.

Of course, not everybody has the gift of overcoming this overnight. It takes a lot of effort and processing. Just keep on feeding your mind with good things. Read more of God’s Word that it would be so etched in your mind. Taking control over our minds is just easy to say but applying it is quite challenging. However, don’t be discouraged, just keep on trying. I myself admit that I am a classic over-thinker myself. My imagination is both my strength and weakness and is just so wide that I can make drama movies out from it. That instant. Haha. That’s why we really need to take control of our minds because if we aren’t careful, the devil might use this against you just like how he used it against me. But, I want to encourage you that nothing is impossible with God. He will never leave you nor forsake you. He loves you and cares for you that He wants you to have a brighter and better future. So, just surrender your ability of overthinking, your bad and impure thoughts, depression, insecurities, suicidal thoughts and more. Think upon what is true, noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report, virtuous, and praiseworthy.

You Are Meant to be Pursued

“Na friendzone ka na ba, Ate?”

“I think it’s okay for ladies to court, right? Some men are just too passive.”

Before we go on, let’s understand first what friendzone means. In the vocabulary of millennials, friendzone is a situation in which one member of a friendship wishes to enter into a romantic relationship, while the other does not. It is generally considered to be an undesirable situation for the rejected person.

To answer the question, if I were a man and I got friendzoned, I might still exert extra effort to win her heart if my intentions are sincere. However, because I’m a woman, it’s different. God designed us in a unique way. Women are meant to be pursued, not to pursue. Therefore, if a man we like doesn’t like us back, then we can’t do something about it other than accept and move on.

MEN INITIATE, WOMEN RESPOND

19249462

There are many love stories that I’ve witnessed women making the first move, most especially in this generation where people are encouraging us to ask men on a date. To simply put, the world is implying that it’s okay for women to become the pursuers. Call me, old-fashioned. But ladies, we need to remember that we were not designed to pursue men. It’s not the right way. God created us women to want to be pursued and He created men to want to pursue. God’s way is always beautiful. Take figure skating as an example:

“The man leads the woman onto the ice and initiates each part of their routine. She receives that leadership and trusts in his strength. His raw, physical strength is more on display than hers; he does all the lifting, twirling, and catching. She complements his strength with her own—a more diminutive and more attractive strength of beauty, grace, speed, and balance. His focus as the head, or leader, is to magnifying her skills. Her focus is on following his lead and signaling her readiness to receive his next move. He takes responsibility for the two of them, and she trusts his leadership and delights in it” (Doing Things Right in Matters of the Heart).

That phrase alone tells us the crucial role of men in a relationship. Wouldn’t it be beautiful if the man himself would do the pursuing? Let him man up if his intentions are real. I may not know you personally, but if you are reading this, I know deep down inside, you don’t want to lead a man. You want a man to lead you. So, wait to be pursued, wooed, and won.

BE PATIENT

giphy (1)

The emphasis on being patient is this: don’t take action because you’re afraid that the guy won’t. When I say “action”, even the slightest and obvious cue that you are interested in that certain person e.g. engaging conversation with this person through text or chat ‘for hours’, calling him in the ‘wee hours’ of night. However, this doesn’t mean that you can’t be friends with men. Just know your limitations. If you are impatient in your efforts, you might end up with with a guy who just isn’t ready to be in a relationship and trust me, the experience will be disappointing at best. Gender roles tell us that men are the ones who should approach you, call you, ask you on a date, follow-up with you, and then ask you out again. Let them do these things. You don’t want a man so paralyzed by his own insecurities that he can’t ask you for a date.

WAIT ON GOD

Wait-on-God-even-when-He-seems-silent

Don’t wait for a man to pursue you, instead wait on God. I’m already a young adult and whenever I encounter elderly people, they would always ask me if I’m already in a romantic relationship. I always tell them that I’m still waiting for the right person to come at the right season because I have to make sure that once I enter this new season, I should also be ready in meeting him at the altar.

So, ladies, don’t be such in a hurry, remember that God is in control of timing, of every man’s heart, of everything:

Proverbs 18:22 says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD.” (Notice that because of God’s favor, the man finds the woman, and not the other way around.)

Similarly, Proverbs 19:14 tells us “House and wealth are inherited from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the LORD.”

While waiting, make the most of the time while you are single. Use this time to learn how to cook, how to do household chores and even budget money. Learn more about who you are and seek God daily through reading bible and praying. I’m pretty sure that when you’re ready and fully equipped in becoming someone’s partner, God’s best will eventually come.
KNOW YOUR WORTH

worth_far_more_than_rubies-1024x777

“But, I’ve waited long enough. Why am I still single?”, “Am I not beautiful?” Take note that someone not liking us back doesn’t mean there’s always something wrong with us. Let’s always go back to His Word, and see our real value and worth. Let’s see how God sees us first.

Proverbs 31:10 “Who can find a virtuous woman, her price is far above rubies” (Proverbs 31:10).

Isn’t it mind blowing or what? We are worth far more than rubies! We are worth more than something that is potentially worth millions of pesos. So, what could our worth possibly be? How about PRICELESS! There isn’t a number that would amount to our worth. You are priceless my sister, you are beautiful, amazing, and ordained. You are a masterpiece. Even in your imperfection you are all of these and much more. Doesn’t this verse give us so much security? Our worth is more than rubies and God himself made that crystal clear.

LET GOD WRITE YOUR STORY

original

All of us has a God-story whether it includes marriage or not. However, we tend to manipulate God’s beautifully written story. We specify on a lot of things. We beg God to do this and that, to give us this and that. So, from now on, let us practice entrusting the pen and paper to God and let Him be the author of our lives because it’s going to be a lot more beautiful and full of romance when we allow Him.

If you’re still single and waiting for God’s best, Don’t worry about it. In fact, you no longer have to search for love to find your worth in a man’s desire for you. God loves you with an everlasting love and that alone is already enough.

Note: All pictures aren’t mine.

All I want for Christmas is You

Before You came into my life, it was nothing but empty space– a void – and no form at all, only darkness. If I have to describe my life, It was nothing, it was shapeless with nothing to be seen– it was a void. I was selfish and full of hate. Always fearful.

Your very presence brought great joy in my life. You make me dance for joy and I can’t explain why. It’s just that you fill my heart afresh each day, love and goodness overflow from my heart. Because of you, I can easily forgive and extend grace. You inspire me so much. You make me happy and appreciate the littlest of things. You are my bright sun and ever-present shield. You’re everything to my planet. I always feel so safe into your arms, you take care of reality, of what is really here. You are my great peace and contentment. You made me realize that silence, weirdly and paradoxically, fills this emptiness in me. I have become to love it because it isn’t absence; it’s where I can feel your presence. Whenever I feel restless about my limitations or what I don’t have or what I think I should have, I just draw myself to you who made my universe possible.

When you came into my life, You saved me from this sinful life and hostile world. You took me out of the darkness, You brought so much warmth into this very cold heart. You removed all the baggage that I am carrying. Suffering from emptiness that literally nothing in this world can fill, You overflowed me with so much adoration. It’s a wonderful feeling that this empty void of space inside my heart can aside from being physically filled with blood can also be spiritually filled by You. It is like you were the hole made for this heart. And now I can say that there was always this dwelling place for You within my heart.

Thank you for turning my futile life into something that is so full of meaning and color. The magnitude of your love is immeasurable and because of that I have loved you even more. Oh, how wonderful it is to be a child of yours and to enjoy this privilege.

This Christmas, what I want is not easy to see, it’s not wrapped in paper nor found under the tree. It’s precious and more valued than gold. All I want is my Savior’s presence, my Jesus. He is the reason why you and I live. He is the reason for this season because 2,000 years ago, He redeemed us from death. He set aside His glory to be dressed up in human flesh so that in the fullness of time, those who trust in His name might be made His sons and daughters. He died on the cross because He loves us even though there’s nothing good in us.

Jesus will always be the best gift ever infiltrated in my heart. 🙂

To Love is to be vulnerable

1Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken..

2If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket — safe, dark, motionless, airless — it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.3456

C.S. Lewis speaks so clearly and powerfully about what it means to love anyone or anything. That love can be difficult, scary, and at times depressing. But at the same time, it is beautiful, exciting and the best thing in the world.

The author mentioned that to love is to be vulnerable. It means that vulnerability is a necessary part of loving an individual. For you to be able to love someone, you’ll need to pull down your walls and allow this person in.

However, what’s painful in loving is that we get hurt or most likely get disappointed by the people we love the most. But what’s living if you aren’t going to love in the full capacity you are capable of?

At the end of the day, what then can we do? Take that leap of faith. Take the risk of loving and trusting people. There is always something to be gained when we go outside ourselves and learn to share in someone else’s world, even if only for a short while. This is applicable whether we’re talking about romantic love, love for our families, friends or just the daily struggle to love our neighbor. Just continue reflecting Christ’s love.

A letter to my sister who’s getting married

 

Cherish each other in big ways and in small ways,

and never forget the magic of those three little words “I LOVE YOU.”

In marriage, remember that it is the little things that make the difference…

Don’t forget the birthdays and the anniversaries (an occasional note means a lot!)

Share each other’s life-even the small details- for too often we forget that day-after-day becomes year-after-year, and then it’s gone.

Give each other room to grow…

We all need our time alone.

Keep strong your faith in each other; time has a funny way of testing us, and it’s faith that gets us through.

And most of all, don’t forget to respect one another. This world could always use more of that. Speak your mind honestly, openly, but with kindness, for angry words are scars that may never heal.

Trust each other; let your trust be your rock. Most of all, each day be sure to hold each other and fall in love all over again. 🙂

 

RWP_6969RWP_6970

RWP_6490

RWP_6501

RWP_6633

Continue reading

An Open Love Letter To You

DSC00584

Dear future partner,

Statistics show there are seven billion people in the world. Seven billion people with different names, different faces, and different perspectives. Some of them are happy, some are confused, some are hurting, and some are indifferent. There are seven billion people in this world. Quite a big number, yet amazingly one of them is YOU.

Perhaps, I’ll meet you in a little coffee shop where I usually study and burn candles for the next dreadful exams, perhaps I’ll meet you at your favorite bookstore, in a church event where I see you worshiping and praising, in a random gathering where unnoticeably we exchanged smiles and laughter or perhaps at my favorite restaurant or like the usual stories in movies where we just bump into each other and capture each other’s thoughts and leave each other’s deep impression. I don’t exactly know where I will be meeting you but maybe, just maybe, you are just a quaint for all these years and you might be reading this right now. I just do not know but one thing’s for sure, God is full of surprises especially when you make Him write your love story.

I may not know who you are yet- your name, your smile, albeit I’m pretty sure you have that lovely face. However, those physical features won’t matter because I know what I’m going to adore about you is your love and burning passion for Christ. There’s nothing more manly on this earth than a man who is so in love in Christ and is fully surrendered to His will. Don’t you worry, all the things that we have been doing alone for quite a long time will soon come to an end and we’ll be finally doing things together. We’ll get awkward on our first date together, hang out with our friends together, eat lots of good food together, conquer our first long hike together, watch our favorite bands together, get a closer and better view on our big smiles, have deep conversation with about anything, go to church and worship God together, pray together, cry together, laugh together, dance and kid around whenever we want to, exchange each other’s Iloveyous and finally use the Iloveyouitmakesmecrazycryhappy. Yes, that wonderful feeling of warmth and sometimes chill, the feel of crazy butterflies in our stomachs. I am more than excited to know that we will feel “kilig” all the days of our lives until we meet at the altar and exchange not only our “I Love Yous” but our “I Dos.”

Always know that I am earnestly and constantly praying for you. I am preserving my heart for you and how lovely it is to think that you would also wait and pray for me. Wait ‘til the right time comes. At this moment, let’s just make God our partner for life before and after we find each other. Let’s wait patiently, pray fervently and start preparing ourselves to be the “right one” for each other. Let us enjoy this season of singleness because when the long wait is over, it will be a meaningful start of our amazing journey together and I’m sure you’re going to love it. You’ll be the happiest man on earth just like the happiest woman that I will be.

To my dearest future partner, there are seven billion people in this world. Many of them could have my heart right now, but I choose to wait if waiting means having our happy ending together with you and my God above.

Your future princess ♥

Wait for me a little more, will you?

1aWait for me a little more, will you? Wait for me ‘til I’m ready. Wait for me to finish medical school. Wouldn’t that be great not to have medical books in between our dinner dates and movie dates? That I no longer have to make our incoming exams and bimonthlies an excuse for forgetting our anniversary date. Wait ‘til I’m already a doctor. Until I am able to take care of you 24/7. Wait for me ‘til I’m mature enough, ‘til I’m ready to share my love to you, ‘til I’m already a wife material, ‘til I’m ready to become the mother of your children, ‘til I’m done chasing my dreams and you. Wait if you can. Keep those feelings intact. Wait even though waiting feels like a journey to a desert. Wait and be hopeful with the Lord. I’m pretty sure that even though waiting is hard, God’s grace will sustain you. Don’t focus on me. Focus on God, wait on Him, seek Him.

Just keep making your life exciting and full, so when we do finally come together, we can bring each other joy. Build your faith and dependence on God, make your family happy, cultivate friendships, be the right person for me as I try to be the right person for you. And then when I’m ready, surprise me. I tell you, it will be one of the most beautiful moments in our lives. It will be worth the long wait.

Wait ‘cause I’m just here. I’m just working my way toward you.

Don’t give up on us… yet.

Yours truly,

Delbeth

The Girl in the Coffee Shop

I went inside the coffee shop to buy a cup of coffee to warm me up. To my surprise, the shop was jam-packed. So I began to look for a vacant chair and table. I searched from the leftmost side and to the right to find a girl sitting alone. I was really bothered to see her studying alone with two vacant chairs. Just as when I was about to complain, the barista whispered saying, “She has always been studying here at that round table, big books open, scattered around and stacked atop each other.” I was mad. Super mad.

I was about to approach her to ask if I could sit with her but the old lady at the other side began to stand to leave her table. Yes! Just about time. Thanks Old lady for the seat.

I finally toted my laptop to the coffee shop to make some headway on my novel. I bought a double espresso, sat down, flipped the screen up and discovered I hadn’t charged the friggin’ battery. So I sat there for a while, sipping idly and occasionally tapping the “ON” button as if that might make some sort of difference. When my eyes began to straight right through the border of my laptop, I began to look at the girl. She was laughing while reading her book or was it because she was enjoying the music from her earphones? I was certainly disgusted to find out that I was kind of enjoying the sight of this girl reading and enjoying her drink. Dude, better focus.

20180210_113443

Okay. I can’t focus. To pass time, I tried figuring out what book she was reading by heading to the comfort room. I passed by and found out that she was a medical student. Mmm. I see determination radiated from her.

Hours passed by. The whole time I was writing my novel with a pen I was also trying to find a way to talk to her or at least say Hello to her but I never wanted to look like a creep. Ha! It’s 10:00 o’clock in the evening and I had never been so productive. Wait, she’s leaving. No. Don’t leave yet. Wait! Why can’t I just talk to her? Darn, I just lost her. It’s moments like this that i wish I could rewind the time that I messed up. I didn’t even say Hello at her. I didn’t even catch her name or better yet get her number. She did look right at me. Smiled and walked away through that door.

It wasn’t over for me so I went back to the coffee shop the next day to wait for her. I ordered 3 different kinds of coffee drinks just to wait until the evening but she didn’t show up. I went back the next day and I still didn’t see her there. Just the smell of the Iced Caramel Macciato in the air sitting down. I just can’t believe that I blew the chance that I had.

Am I falling in love with the girl at the coffee shop? I don’t know her name but it’s her that I am always thinking of. Never would I have guessed that I’d fall for a stranger. Never thought that I’d fall in love with the girl at the coffee shop. With my desperation, I can’t believe I even asked an old man about her. I can’t believe I sounded like stalker or am I really a stalker?

*Tink* I heard the bell over the door tinkling. Then and there I saw her for the first time with her uniform. Beauty walked right in front of me with a book on her hand as she went to the cash register. “One Vanilla Bean Frappucino with Caramel, please.”

This is my chance. There’s no turning back. I approached the cash register looking at the book she was holding. It wasn’t a medical book but it says Do it. Wow. Thanks buddy for inspiring me to do this. Here we go.

“Excuse me, Miss. My Name is Derek. I’ll get the same thing but first make the girl’s drink a venti.” #SuperTheMoves

Sorry for the random story. Haha!

I Don’t Want To Date You… Just Yet

Featured Image -- 220

To that one person out there…

I don’t want to date you if we are just driven with hormones and chemicals inside our bodies; instead I want to go out with you when both of us are sure that we are not controlled by just our emotions. We respect each other’s bodies by honoring it. We see each other beyond attraction alone.

I don’t want to date you when you’re not sure of yourself nor you’re not sure of us. Let’s bid goodbye to dating as something like trial and error. Let’s not see it as something that will decipher how sure we are of ourselves. Hence, let us first be saturated and secured on His love alone. Only in this way we’ll be able to say that we are certain of ourselves.

I don’t want to date you when you’re just after a heartbreak, because I want to give you that space to heal. I hope you’re giving yourself that kind of space too. I also hope that you will use that space to focus on God, on yourself, on your dreams, and on your family. So when the time comes that you’ll meet me, you already know that you are  complete.

I don’t want to date you if you’re not intentional, because being intentional means that you know your motive. And the motive behind dating and courtship is you see me as the person who’ll be with you and grow old with you.

I don’t want to date you if you think that your world should revolve around me, but I want to date you when you know that there is so much more to life. I want you to know that there’s so much beauty and wonder all around us. I hope you’ll see that soon enough.

I don’t want to date you if you still have dreams that will be compromised if you’re with me, instead I want you to use the time that you have now to explore, to try, to fail, and to learn.

I don’t want to date you when God is asking you to serve Him alone because I’m sure He’s asking you this for He is still pruning you and training you.

I don’t want to date you if I’ll just be getting your attention and focus away from God, but I want to date you when both of us will lead each other to Christ, and we love Him more than we love each other.

I don’t want to date you if you’re not yet ready to give up old (and bad) habits because true love also meant sacrifice. I believe that being in a relationship and being single are different responsibilities. In a relationship, you’ll not just think of yourself, but for the other person as well. So I wish you’ll be ready to give up selfish desires if you’ll be dating me.

I don’t want to date you if you think that I’ll change and fix you, nor will I complete you;I can’t and that’s not my job. God will do that for you. I want to date you because it meant to glorify God. The two of us will be persons who will go beyond  their egos. Two imperfect people who will strive to give a perfect love. And I do think that it will please God. So much.

I don’t want to date you just yet because I love you too much to grab this time that God has given you to become the person you are meant to be.

P.S. I don’t want to date a perfect guy and I know you’ll never be that.  No. I will date you because you’re man enough to pursue me and you’re godly enough to know that God is leading you to me. So please, let’s not be impatient. I know there are lonely and tiring nights. But I want to tell you that I exist, and God sees every little thing we do to honor Him. Let’s not give up on each other (even if we still don’t know each other yet). But I hope we strive to be as faithful as we can be. Just so you know, I believe in you. For that matter, for now, please wait. ….

 

He loved us first.

To that one person out there…

View original post 706 more words