The Beauty of Being Single

It’s the wonderful month of hearts once again and the awaited Valentine’s Day is coming up. However, it can’t be denied that there are some single people trying to put on their sad faces because they don’t have someone they call “Signficant Other.”

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The word ‘single’ carries one of the most negative connotations these days. In the public’s eye, being single is equivalent to being lonesome. Who said being single is ugly and to be ashamed of? Who said single life prevents you from being happy and contented? We think such things because we are clearly brainwashed by the world’s standards. Being single is actually full of enlightenment and self-finding. Therefore, don’t go gloomy every Valentine’s day because February 14 is just a day that will just go by.

THANK GOD FOR BEING SINGLE

I’ve heard more married people thank God for their season of singleness than I’ve heard single people thank God in their season of singleness. It gives the impression that now, in retrospect, they realize what God was doing all along while they were single and they thank Him for it, which is good, nothing wrong with that, because of course, sometimes, if not most times, we don’t understand and fully appreciate what God is doing until later. But do we have to wait until we understand it before we thank Him? Does it have to be until we get it that we can express our gratitude?

You know, the bible tells us to “thank [God] in everything [no matter what the circumstances may be, be thankful and give thanks], for this is the will of God for you [who are] in Christ Jesus [the Revealer and Mediator of that will]”. -1 Thessalonians 5:18

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Being single is a time that you can never get back once you get married (I’m emphasizing marriage here because there’s no other way we’re heading to once we’re in a romantic relationship but marriage). Being tied to your lifetime partner is just equal to more responsibilities, bidding goodbye to that freedom of doing anything on your own, making decisions by yourself, scheduling your daily routine and many more.

THANK GOD FOR THIS SEASON OF WAITING

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Each season of our lives has its place and purpose. There is a season to be a baby and then a season to be a child. There is a season to be a teenager and then a season to be an adult. There is a season to be single and then to get married. So, don’t be such in a hurry in getting into a relationship. You might miss the good things in this beautiful season. Just remember that wherever we are right now is a season that God has placed in our lives to take pleasure in and enjoy before finally sharing our love to someone.

You may not like this season He has you in, you may not understand how you are 30 going on 31 and you are not even dating anyone, when you thought you’d have 2 kids by now, you may not understand why most of your friends are married and you’re still in school studying Law or Medicine and still livin’ la Vida sola (Haha, please I need you to laugh). You may not understand how everyone else’s boyfriend/girlfriend has been able to find them but it seems yours is having some difficulties finding his/her way.

You may not understand it all, perhaps that’s why God says, to trust in Him with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, stop trying to figure it out, just trust Him. You can trust Him because He is so, so faithful.

THANK GOD FOR GIVING YOU THE OPPORTUNITY TO PRAY & GROW

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If you are single and have prayed and prayed for someone to love you forever, and that man/woman has not appeared, don’t think God has forgotten you. I mention this because I hear this a lot. Continue to give all your needs to the Lord and tell Him you trust Him to fulfill them. Tell Him you recognize that your greatest need is for more of Him. Don’t let discouragement about your situation cause you to settle for anything less than what God has for you. At the same time, don’t make your requirements so strict that no one can ever live up to them or would even want to try. Ask God what He wants before you tell Him what you want.

Seek the wisdom and guidance of the Holy Spirit, and trust Him that He knows what (and who) is best for you. Serve God by staying in the center of His will, doing what He has asked you to do, and giving of yourself for His kingdom. When we are obedient in all of the things God is asking of us, we end up at the right place at the right time. And timing is extremely important. Make God the fulfillment of your greatest dreams and needs, and He will hear your prayers about the deepest longings of your heart. Don’t give up or stop praying; just continue growing deeper in your walk with the Lord

I Don’t Want To Date You… Just Yet

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To that one person out there…

I don’t want to date you if we are just driven with hormones and chemicals inside our bodies; instead I want to go out with you when both of us are sure that we are not controlled by just our emotions. We respect each other’s bodies by honoring it. We see each other beyond attraction alone.

I don’t want to date you when you’re not sure of yourself nor you’re not sure of us. Let’s bid goodbye to dating as something like trial and error. Let’s not see it as something that will decipher how sure we are of ourselves. Hence, let us first be saturated and secured on His love alone. Only in this way we’ll be able to say that we are certain of ourselves.

I don’t want to date you when you’re just after a heartbreak, because I want to give you that space to heal. I hope you’re giving yourself that kind of space too. I also hope that you will use that space to focus on God, on yourself, on your dreams, and on your family. So when the time comes that you’ll meet me, you already know that you are  complete.

I don’t want to date you if you’re not intentional, because being intentional means that you know your motive. And the motive behind dating and courtship is you see me as the person who’ll be with you and grow old with you.

I don’t want to date you if you think that your world should revolve around me, but I want to date you when you know that there is so much more to life. I want you to know that there’s so much beauty and wonder all around us. I hope you’ll see that soon enough.

I don’t want to date you if you still have dreams that will be compromised if you’re with me, instead I want you to use the time that you have now to explore, to try, to fail, and to learn.

I don’t want to date you when God is asking you to serve Him alone because I’m sure He’s asking you this for He is still pruning you and training you.

I don’t want to date you if I’ll just be getting your attention and focus away from God, but I want to date you when both of us will lead each other to Christ, and we love Him more than we love each other.

I don’t want to date you if you’re not yet ready to give up old (and bad) habits because true love also meant sacrifice. I believe that being in a relationship and being single are different responsibilities. In a relationship, you’ll not just think of yourself, but for the other person as well. So I wish you’ll be ready to give up selfish desires if you’ll be dating me.

I don’t want to date you if you think that I’ll change and fix you, nor will I complete you;I can’t and that’s not my job. God will do that for you. I want to date you because it meant to glorify God. The two of us will be persons who will go beyond  their egos. Two imperfect people who will strive to give a perfect love. And I do think that it will please God. So much.

I don’t want to date you just yet because I love you too much to grab this time that God has given you to become the person you are meant to be.

P.S. I don’t want to date a perfect guy and I know you’ll never be that.  No. I will date you because you’re man enough to pursue me and you’re godly enough to know that God is leading you to me. So please, let’s not be impatient. I know there are lonely and tiring nights. But I want to tell you that I exist, and God sees every little thing we do to honor Him. Let’s not give up on each other (even if we still don’t know each other yet). But I hope we strive to be as faithful as we can be. Just so you know, I believe in you. For that matter, for now, please wait. ….

 

He loved us first.

To that one person out there…

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