Physician with a Heart

Hello, friends.

To describe my week, it has been nothing but very dragging and exhausting. All because of the incoming holidays, my mind can’t keep up with the school responsibilities. I’m always tardy, I nap during lectures, I am forced to go on duty and make my clinical formulation and the worst is, I haven’t been studying the  number of chapters to read because I find it so lengthy and boring. I feel worthless and all the more I feel ineffective because of the rainy weather. I guess my brain is already on vacation mode. Of course, I do feel guilty of not studying but I shouldn’t only be studying just to pass the exam, I should be studying to learn, to help my future patients and become a good doctor.

Because of my deep reflection which happened a while ago, I remembered this certain doctor who had a memorial lecture on our school. I can remember so well his encouraging talk. He said that the path we chose on becoming a doctor is not an easy one and that it is difficult to defy. And on our daily journey as doctors, there will be challenges that are difficult to face and our character will be tested. However, we shouldn’t be worried when facing such challenges because day by day this will sharpen us to be a better version of ourselves. However, I realized that the more I am almost done with medical school, the more I feel so inadequate and that my brain has 0% information. I feel like I have become a monster: so lazy, complacent and undisciplined. Well, not all the time. Haha.

Being a medical student means we are always struggling just to get through the year after the other especially on the never-ending reading and studying that this profession requires. “Cover to cover, over and over.” But I realized that studying will be more hard beyond the four walls of my school, especially when I am left on my own to deal with my patients.

I realized that I should complain less with the number of books to read or study for the upcoming exam because there is a far more difficult test waiting for me in the real world, and if the power of five books is already too much for me to handle, then maybe, I am not fit to face the real challenge.

From the thick medical books to the thinnest of journals and papers. They are there to constantly update us with the new research discoveries, may it be new diseases, new equipment or new procedures. A doctor myself must be equipped with the essential tools as to not cause unnecessary harm on my patients, and by tools, I mean knowledge, updated knowledge.

Medicine has not been and will never be about the grades. It is actually the passion to help and care for others that will be the measure of one’s ability to become a good physician. That passion will be the driving force for every medical student to strive in school, not because he wants to get good grades, but because he wants to learn all aspects of human health in order to deliver the best care he can for his future patients. In that way, we will never get tired studying and reading. Of course, we do get tired but if our thoughts are sync with this idea then no matter how tired we are, we will still be happy and contented at the very end of day.

 

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Medical student feels

The more I read, the more I feel so inadequate. I’m not good enough. I’m not smart enough. Can I still do this for the next years to come?

Yet despite this internal battle I face daily while learning in medlical school, almost always when the tears just barely begin to well up in my eyes, a feeling of peace overwhelms me. Maybe I’m inadequate. Maybe I’m not good or smart enough and maybe I can’t do this…

BUT..

With my God, nothing is impossible. And with Him, all things are possible. The things that were only asked of me to do is to just take up my cross daily, follow and love Him, which right now, as much as I don’t like some of the things that I am doing- missing important events, staying up late to complete paperworks and read tons of chapters, getting stressed out with clinics, etc., means I need to do my part and try my hardest to learn this material to the best of my ability. All I can ask of myself is my best effort, and God will take care of the rest.

In a world and a life with so much uncertainty and unexpected challenges, I find comfort that my worries are irrational in light of a God that will see me through any and all circumstances and will never abandon me.

And so, I press on, trying to replace my worries with God’s love and grace, which, no matter what happens, will protect and carry me wherever this crazy life should take me.

To Love is to be vulnerable

1Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken..

2If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket — safe, dark, motionless, airless — it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.3456

C.S. Lewis speaks so clearly and powerfully about what it means to love anyone or anything. That love can be difficult, scary, and at times depressing. But at the same time, it is beautiful, exciting and the best thing in the world.

The author mentioned that to love is to be vulnerable. It means that vulnerability is a necessary part of loving an individual. For you to be able to love someone, you’ll need to pull down your walls and allow this person in.

However, what’s painful in loving is that we get hurt or most likely get disappointed by the people we love the most. But what’s living if you aren’t going to love in the full capacity you are capable of?

At the end of the day, what then can we do? Take that leap of faith. Take the risk of loving and trusting people. There is always something to be gained when we go outside ourselves and learn to share in someone else’s world, even if only for a short while. This is true whether we’re talking about romantic love, love for our families, friends or just the daily struggle to love our neighbor. Just continue reflecting Christ’s love.

Choose Godly men

For the past few weeks, I have been inspired by a handful of men I know and just met whose hearts are set on fire for God.

I want to thank God today for Godly men.

I thank God for using their lives– men who truly give their time, talents and treasure for the one True King. Oh, What a deep joy it is to see these men leading and serving God above all else. Because of this, they also lead ladies to live a life that put God first and to be a catalyst of Christ’s love.

Single ladies, it is my earnest prayer that you don’t make the same mistake that I did. For the longest time, I have overlooked priceless treasures because they did not shine right before my eyes. I have disregarded what the Bible said about being unequally yoked with an unbeliever because for a Christian to enter into a partnership with an unbeliever is to court disaster. Thankfully, the Lord opened my eyes that I could not spend my future with a man who doesn’t honor my God, most especially a man who can’t lead me to The One who gives me abundant life.

But, I praise God because He has allowed me to truly see beyond the superficial towards what really matters in the eyes of God.

– a man who leads and initiates AND does not mislead a lady but guards her heart.

– a man who upholds purity AND does not allow you to compromise.

– a man who stays humble AND vigilant against pride.

– a man who respects not only to a lady that he likes but to ALL ladies. In short, he is not a ninja who is always on the move to impress you.

– a man who is emotionally stable AND is secure in God.

– who not only reads the Word of God but meditates on it day and night

– who gets into meaningful conversation that inspire you to seek God more AND not on a meaningless chat.

and a lot more.

These men may be around you right now, and sometimes they are overlooked. But they indeed shine with the light of Jesus. Therefore, affirm these men and pray that may their rare breed multiply. Haha! 😊

BREAKING RECORD: 5 places in 1 day

Hurray!

After what seemed to be a long and dreadful semester of being a 3rd year medical student, I have finally had the chance to exercise thy freedom of excitement! Yes! No more books to read! No more sleepless nights! No more research papers! No more 10 hour duties with toxic patients! No more alarm clocks!

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Since it was my post birthday, my bestfriend, Eviejoy, decided to take me out on a date. Wohoo, another B and B moment. It was like a you-deserve-a-break and catching up date and was partly a treat for my birthday even though she already drowned me with birthday surprises.

On our way to our destination, it was a nostalgic feeling to be back in Gaas and experience the rollercoaster ride of twist and turns, of direct assaults and downhills once again. With Cebu’s scorching weather, I really missed the cool wind carressing my cheeks and the white fogs blocking the road. When I breathe in, it’s like I am breathing in the laughter, thoughts, memories,  joys and moments I shared with this lass a few years back!

First stop: Buwakan ni Alejandra

After Sirao Flower Garden, the newest tourist destination that Cebuanos is crazy about is Buwakan ni Alejandra.

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Upon entering the garden, you will see the colorful varieties of different types of flowers. Too bad we can’t afford to have a drone to really let you see the whole garden but it’s a beautiful sight I tell you!

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By just looking at it, it has really been carefully planned and designed. I love that the owner made sure to create foot paths in the garden. This way, you can’t accidentally step on the plants and flowers.

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Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another”

And, the good thing about these flowers is that they bloom all year round so everyone can visit the place anytime in its full glory. I’d give this place a thumbs up! A must visit especially to those who love flowers and plants! Continue reading

We are God’s delight

Ever felt so horrible trying your best to do the right thing in order to get something but it didn’t end up the way you planned it?

Let’s say, I have this friend who studies a lot but then doesn’t get a good grade meanwhile her classmate keeps on partying, sleeping and worst, cheating yet gets the good grades. Or is this you working so hard to pass on an interview but wasn’t accepted yet a friend without putting so much effort unexpectedly got the job. Is this you following all the rules during your pregnancy, she didn’t, and you found out that your baby has some congenital anomaly? Is this you praying for this lady for years but she still doesn’t picture her life with you?

“That feeling when we obey Jesus but we feel like the road we are going into is wrecked with heartbreak.”

This sentiments seem so familiar and is something we’ve all experienced, right? It’s truly difficult when we are doing the right things, and we see people doing the wrong things receiving the blessings that we desire. Whatever the circumstance, it’s common to compare and wonder what God is doing for others and not doing for us.

Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the lord's purpose that prevails.Proverbs 19-21

The Bible teaches us that God does answer our prayers (John 16:24). But there are a few things we have to be reminded at:

  • God’s answer may not always be what we were hoping for and it is always His purpose that prevails.
  • His answer sometimes is simply a “NO.”
  • His answer might be something we’ll never completely understand.
  • Always remember that His answer is always the BEST answer.
  • Always check your motives.

He loves us dearly, and His answers to our desires, longings and prayers are always what we need … even if they’re not necessarily what we want.

So… Is God even in control? Does He care about you…about me?

YES. YES. and a YES. There are things in our lives that we want to take over. We want to make our own rules. But stress relief always starts with letting God be God. The concept of the control of God over everything is called the “sovereignty” of God. Nothing gives me strength and confidence like an understanding of the sovereignty of God in my life. I hope you have this understanding, too. Always know that God is in complete control of every molecule in the universe at every moment, and everything that happens is allowed by Him for His own perfect purposes.

Does He care? Take a minute to count your blessings. Maybe we are so focused on other’s lives that we forgot that we’ve been blessed countless of times. Maybe we’re not contented with the life that we have at the moment. Maybe we have been carrying wrong motives all this time.

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There are a lot of verses that God says we are His delight, His beloved. When we measure our circumstances or compare our blessings to that of another, it is so easy to feel slighted, overlooked, and even abandoned. But when we open our eyes to the grand story happening all around us, we see the beauty that leaves us speechless. Yes, God delights in me. He delights in you. He is a good God that loves you dearly and blesses you no matter what you did or didn’t do. Not an obligatory love, but a love that delights in who you are.

I don’t know why some people fail while doing their best and others pass without putting in effort. I don’t know why God healed her family, but not your own. I don’t know why until now you can’t win her heart. I don’t know why your growing baby has a deformity. But I do know that we miss the expansive view of grace if we are focused on everyone else’s story.

Always remember that God is sovereign. That He knows what He is doing and He is always a good God even if we didn’t get what we want. We may not understand His plan for us but it will always be a good thing to trust His will for our lives because He knows everything. Just Trust in Him. (Provers 3:5-6)

Can you relate? Have you ever felt slighted by God? Start erasing those negative thoughts in your mind and start trusting His will for your life. 🙂

God’s promises

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. (Matthew 6:33)

★ Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. (Psalm 37:4)

★ For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. (Jeremiah 29:11-13; some quote only verse 11 but I love how the Lord quoted verse 11 to 13)

★ Your Father already knows your needs. He will give you all you need from day to day if you make the Kingdom of God your primary concern. (Luke 12:30-31)

★ Stop doubting and believe (John 20:27)

★ But i know that even now God will give you whatever you ask (John.11:22)

★ If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer. (Matthew.21:22)

★ Don’t worry about anything; instead pray about everything. With thankful hearts offer up your prayers and requests to God. Then, because you belong to Christ Jesus, God will bless you with peace that no one can completely understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6-7)

★ And my God will fully satisfy every need of yours according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:19)

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)

There are many verses found in the bible that show God’s promises to you and these are my favorite ones! Remember that God’s Word is full of promises and these are promises made to His children whom He loves. And because God is God, and His very nature is truth, He cannot be unfaithful to all these promises. Everything that He promised to each of us, we can trust Him to carry out completely.

These verses are God’s guarantees to you. Through prayer and practice, these promises can become part of your life, giving you hope, joy and victory 🙂

Taipei, Taiwan Day 3

Day 3

Dec. 20, 2016

First stop: Maokong

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The weather that time was a perfect fit to go on another exciting tour!

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The first thing to do is: BUY CARD! I have with me cards for both the cable car ride and the MRT.

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When asked what’s the best place to visit, people would never forget to mention the famous Maokong. They say it’s one of the unique things to try in Taipei City and I couldn’t agree more! Why? I think it’s because Maokong Gondola’s scenic cable car ride is the bomb!

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Walking our way to the entrance to wait in queue.

 

Maokong Gondola is a gondola lift transportation system that offers you to view the city on different perspectives. You will be able to fly and witness panoramas beyond your expectations that will definitely take your breath away. There are two types of cable cars: the normal cabin and the crystal cabin (glass-bottom cars). Of course, we chose the crystal cabins for better view!

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Weeee! Ain’t it a good view?

Continue reading

How to get away with Ungodly Fear

“IF YOU ARE ALWAYS AFRAID AND ANXIOUS ABOUT ANYTHING… THEN, THERE’S ONE ANSWER TO IT… YOU DON’T BELIEVE IN GOD.”

Those were the words that struck me hard when our pastor was preaching during our Sunday service. This month was full of fear and anxiety. To name some reasons are my concern to Marawi city, near my hometown, was attacked by heartless Maute group, next, I was waiting for a very big news in school. There’s not a day that I think of what could happen in the next few days. There are nights that I feel hopeless and sad and afraid. There are days that I doubt His greatness. There are days that I think I deserved to be punished because of my wrong doings. Days passed by, the burden became more heavy that I can no longer bear. So, I poured out my heart in prayer.

Here’s what I learned from my reflection: God does not want us to live in fear. Fear definitely does not come from Him. It’s this world that teaches us to fear. The things that we see in movies, newspapers, and books are what make us afraid. The things we hear people say and see them do causes us to have fear. The enemy can make us afraid of everything, including our future. It wears us down worrying that something we fear is going to happen anytime and anywhere of the day. BUT we don’t have to be tormented by fear.

There are two kinds of fear: godly and ungodly. We must pray that we live in godly fear, which is good, and not give place to ungodly fear, which is tormenting.

One of the most common types of ungodly fear is the fear of man or a fear of rejection (one of my greatest fears). It’s a trap we can fall into without ever realizing it. In order to protect ourselves from it, we have to care more about what God says than what anyone else says. WE must look to Him for approval and acceptance and not to people. If God does not have first place in our hearts, we are constantly fearing, like myself. I admit my relationship with God that time was shaky. I was giving more time with my studies than my quiet time with Him. That’s why with a single petty problem, I freak out and get worried A LOT, I get paranoid A LOT.

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But remember that the Word reminds us that fear of man brings a snare, however, for those who trusts in the Lord shall be safe. There are so many things to be afraid of in this world. Sometimes all it takes is one news report to fill us with fear. Our imaginations alone can frighten us. TRUST ME. I hate my imaginations. I can make a horror movie in just 10 seconds.

So, there are 4 good ways on how to get away with ungodly fear that I would like to share to you.

PRAY.

Philippians 4:6-7  “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Joshua 1:9 “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

1 Peter 5:7 “Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.”

1 John 4:18 “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.”

These are one of my favorite verses and these are famous ones, too. Many people memorize it wholeheartedly but when fear strikes, it is easily forgotten. Everyone feels afraid at some point-whether it is an anxious feeling in taking an exam or a phobia. Any change, even positive changes like marriage or a promotion, can prompt feelings of fear. But it just depends on how you respond to that fear.  To me, when I am afraid, I immediately pray to God because pouring out my emotions to the One that loves me so much is very comforting. Talk to God about your fears because He cares and He will without a doubt is ready to help you and guide you. I consider this as a blessing because it draws me closer to Him.

So when you’re afraid, always ask God to guard your heart and mind from the spirit of fear. Ask him to take that fear and replace it with His perfect love. Go back to His word. Cling to His word and His promises. Get hungry for His word. God is powerful and when you ask Him to take that fear from you, He will deliver you from it.

CONTROL WHAT YOU RECEIVE INTO YOUR MIND.

This week, I kept on entertaining thoughts from different people about how afraid they are on what will happen in the future. Some people are sharing me “What if” stories like what if we fail or what if our final exam grades weren’t enough. I kept on entertaining negative thoughts that also heightened my fear in failing. At times, I try to get away with it by watching tv but when I watch, I see many bad news and it adds more to my burden. So I decided to lock myself in my own room and spent my whole day listening to praise and worship songs, talking to God in prayer and meditating His word.

You see, the things of the world often make us afraid. Your fear depends on what kind of input you are receiving from the world. If you are a kind of person who listens to negative thoughts, watch scary  movies or frightening television shows, or anything that’s not good to us then you better decide to stop it now or else it will add on more fear and it doesn’t even help at all.

Do whatever you can to stay close to God. Fear disappears in the presence of the Lord.

BE IN THE WORD OF GOD.

Many times in my life when I am afraid, I found that all fear left me just from reading the Bible. In Medical school, it is filled with pressure and hardship and when I feel like I’ve been choked by all the circumstances. I try to pause for a while and then open my bible to read scriptures that encourage me. When I do, I tend to forget all my problems and my fear. Knowing what God’s Word says about our fear and the promises He has given us can make all the difference. In the face of fear, speaking the Word out loud is a powerful weapon against it, too.

LIVE IN THE FEAR OF THE LORD.

The more you get to know the Lord and understand who He is, the more you will reverence Him and fear His displeasure. This is called the fear of the Lord, and it makes you want to obey Him. It’s what draws you closer to God and increases your longing for more of Him. It makes you forget all the things that cause you fear, because they pale in comparison to His awesome power. When you have the fear of the Lord, you fear what your life would be like without Him.